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I saw The Perish... Curious???
| Message Board > Show Reviews > I saw The Perish... Curious??? |
| SweetGrass | Okay, it's SweetGrass here, trying her best to give a review with some respect to any performer with the kahunas to get on a stage and perform. That said this was the most dismal of stage shows I've ever seen. Downstage left, the set was made of green garbage bags over some scaffolding,infront of this were some sad little fake x-mas trees that still had some of their tinsel from last x-mas. Upstage left was a fridge box painted as a stove, some chairs and a table. The upstage right was full of computers and equipment with the recorded drums, and F.X for the show. Downstage right was yet another Fridge box, I'm not sure what it was and this is where the guitar player stood and played. Centre stage for most of it was fog and Christine Battiston playing...bass and lollygagging about in her garter and flowy black see thru thing with Austin Powers type silver thigh high boots. It opened with approximatley 30 people in the house,late at 9:15 and an insider in the theatre told me only 7 tickets had been sold, and the group were handing out freebies on the street at 8:45. Lights were black but for some glow sticks and rolling party lights. Adam Wilkinson did his best to add some interest with the lights from the Royal and Gobos, but all it did was let you see their incompetence. The plot seemed to be an alian abduction and the lead guitar player was wearing a long grey hooded alian robe ( like what you get at Shopper's for Halloween) and glow paint. There were two so called dancers who girated about in similar attire to Christine, and had not much rhythm,, I'm still not sure why they were there, and one actor who delivered his lines like a train. To be honest there was something talented in the make up of the guitar playing, and Jeff sites, Yes, Led Zeppelin,Tea party and others as his influences. You can hear this in his lead guitar and vocal work. Unfortunately it gets lost against the pre-recorded...rhythmically challenged drum tracks; and seriously lost against the few written lines of acted dialogue that make the Trailor Park Boys look like Shakespearean Thespians. The show now continues without me, as at the first intermission, I left. The audience of 30 was heckling the performers with lines like" how bout some more cheese?" and mimicking orgasms back to the performers while our hero was having alians working on him and he was crying out in Pain! I have to give some props for this group to have a vision and follow it through and I did not want to stay and watch the heckling become uncomfortable for them. The whole thing was reminiscent of the stonehenge scene in Spinal Tap where the dancing dwarfs are in front of a 20 inch high Stonehenge replica. However this group was serious and really, really bad. I would rcommend to this group to strip down the theatrics and really put togather a band, starting small and building. I think in the long run, Jeff Noyes has something to offer musically that got overshadowed by the terrible production values of this show - Sun, 25 May 2003 12:05am | ||
| Anonymous | Brutal - Sun, 25 May 2003 1:04am | ||
| Anonymous | Does that mean that not even 7 friends or family supported them in this venture? What about the industry people that they spoke of in their interviews? Was anyone from The Q there? Will they continue to pursue their "100 date cross Canada tour"? Will Christine continue stripping? - Sun, 25 May 2003 1:07am | ||
| stone henge | O.K., ist es SweetGrass hier und versucht ihr bestes, um eine Zusammenfassung mit etwas Respekt zu jedem m�glichem Ausf�hrenden mit den kahunas zu geben, um auf einem Stadium zu erhalten und durchzuf�hren. Da� besagt dieses der Stadium Erscheinen ich dismal war, haben �berhaupt gesehen. Gelassenes Downstage, das Set wurde von den gr�nen Abfallbeuteln �ber irgendeinem Bauger�st, infront von diesem waren einige traurige kleine gef�lschte Weihnachtsb�ume gebildet, die noch etwas von ihrem Filterstreifen vom letzten Weihnachten hatten. Werten Sie war nach links ein K�hlraumkasten ab, der als Ofen, einige St�hle und Tabelle gemalt wird. Das abwertenrecht war von den Computern und von der Ausr�stung mit den gespeicherten Trommeln und von F.X f�r das Erscheinen voll. Downstage Recht war dennoch ein anderer K�hlraumkasten, bin ich nicht sicher, was er war und dieser ist, wo der Guitarre Spieler stand und spielte. Mittestadium f�r Meiste war Nebel und Christine Battiston das Spielen... Ba� und das Lollygagging ungef�hr in ihrem Strumpfband und in flowy Schwarzen sehen durch Sache mit Austin Energien Typen hohe Aufladungen des Silberschenkels. Er �ffnete mit approximatley 30 Leute im Haus, sp�t bei 9:15 und einem Eingeweihten im Theater erkl�rte mir, da� nur 7 Karten verkauft worden waren und die Gruppe Werbegeschenke auf der Stra�e bei 8:45 austeilten. Lichter waren aber f�r etwas Gl�henst�cke und RollenParteilichter schwarz. Adam Wilkinson tat sein bestes, um etwas Interesse mit den Lichtern vom k�niglichen und von den Gobos hinzuzuf�gen, aber alles, das es, war lie� Sie sehen ihre Unf�higkeit. Der Plot schien, eine alian Abduktion zu sein und der Leitung Guitarre Spieler trug eine lange graue mit Kapuze alian Robe (wie, was Sie am K�ufer f�r Halloween erhalten) und Gl�henfarbe. Es gab zwei sogenannte T�nzer, die ungef�hr in der �hnlichen Kleidung zu Christine girated, und hatte nicht viel Rhythmus, ich sind noch nicht sicher, warum sie dort waren, und ein Schauspieler, der seine Zeilen wie eine Serie lieferte. Ehrlich zu sein dort war etwas, das in der Marke oben der spielenden Guitarre begabt ist, und Jeff Sites f�hrten ja Zeppelin, TeenPartei und andere als seine Einfl�sse. Sie k�nnen dieses in seiner Leitung Guitarre und in vocal Arbeit h�ren. Leider geht es gegen die vorher aufgenommenen... rhythmisch herausgeforderten Trommelspuren verloren; und ernsthaft verloren gegen die wenigen schriftlichen Zeilen des fungierten Dialogs, die die Trailor Park-Jungen wie Shakespearean Thespians aussehen lassen. Das Erscheinen f�hrt jetzt ohne mich, als an der ersten Unterbrechung, ich nach links fort. Das Publikum von 30 hechelte die Ausf�hrenden mit Zeilen wie ", wie Zeitraum mehr K�se?" und Orgasmen zur�ck zu den Ausf�hrenden, w�hrend unser Held alians auf hatte, ihm zu arbeiten und ihm nachzuahmen war Schreien heraus in den Schmerz! Ich mu� einige St�tzen geben, damit diese Gruppe einen Anblick hat und ihm und mir durch zu folgen wollte nicht bleiben und das Hecheln zu �berwachen werden Sie f�r sie unbequem. Die vollst�ndige Sache war von der stonehenge Szene im spinalen Hahn erinnernd, in dem die tanzenden Zwerge vor einer 20 Zoll hohen Stonehenge Replik sind. Jedoch war diese Gruppe und wirklich ernst, wirklich falsch. Ich rcommend zu dieser Gruppe, die hinunter das theatrics entfernt w�rde und wirklich togather ein Band gesetzt w�rde, das Beginnen klein und Aufbauen. Ich denke langfristig, Jeff Noyes habe etwas, das musikalisch anzubieten, das r�ber erhalten wird - Sun, 25 May 2003 1:11am | ||
| Masturbating The War God User Info... | Sounds like it was pretty bad. $40 spent on a ticket, imagine the things you could have done with that. - Sun, 25 May 2003 1:22am | ||
| Gallows End Fan | Like, I could have seen Gallows end about 8 times! - Sun, 25 May 2003 1:28am | ||
| Anonymous | And watch The Perish blame us lame Victorians for not being more interested in their "Alien Rock Theatre". They will obviously respond with negativity towards the community because we're so "small time", etc. etc. without even acknowledging that they have never performed before and they charged $40 (and they have also never even posted an MP3 or ANYTHING for that matter). - Sun, 25 May 2003 1:34am | ||
| Sympathy Pains | To the Perish: Hate to say "WE TOLD YOU SO..." BUT!!! I guess at least you got your name right! - Sun, 25 May 2003 1:55am | ||
| BigMan | I'm still confused with what The Perish's intentions were. They claimed they spent $20,000 on lights but I don't believe that. I kept on thinking maybe their intentions were "The jokes on them" but I'm not sure. They didn't need a big venue like the Royal Theatre to perform that show. They did not use the whole stage. The usher I spoke with said that 70 tickets were sold, not 7. Though that probably doesn't really make much of a difference. The hecklers in the crowd weren't funny and just made the show worse. They were unoriginal and repetative. Overall it was a very strage experience and I guess we will all have to wait and see what the next step for The Perish is. - Sun, 25 May 2003 2:02am | ||
| Anonymous | if they didnt take themselves so seriously i bet they could sell out lucky bar once a week doing it - Sun, 25 May 2003 2:05am | ||
| SweetGrass | Wow, I've never heard myself in german before...Oh and I did not pay for these tickets!!! - Sun, 25 May 2003 2:07am | ||
| Anonymous | Was there ANY sign of the "important industry people" there? Were they the ones heckling? - Sun, 25 May 2003 2:10am | ||
| Anonymous | I doubt any industry types were there. If they were they left after about 3 minutes... - Sun, 25 May 2003 2:12am | ||
| Anonymous | YOU SAID: "The usher I spoke with said that 70 tickets were sold, not 7. Though that probably doesn't really make much of a difference. " If 70 tickets were sold then why were there only 30 or so people there??? I suppose The Perish bought most of the 70 tickets? - Sun, 25 May 2003 2:14am | ||
| In my humble opinion | What's the saying? PRIDE GOETH BEFORE A FALL ????? If they had a little more humility, less arrogance and tried to be a bit more humble in their attitudes, they might have had more people supporting them and helping them get ahead. If Jeff does have some talent to offer - he's going to have to start over, but I think he's have burned too many bridges around here. - Sun, 25 May 2003 2:14am | ||
| BigMan | Your guess is as good as mine - Sun, 25 May 2003 2:16am | ||
| Shaggy User Info... | Excelent review Sweetgrass ;) Ahh the pains one must endure to have to sit through it so you could write the review. I wonder if either the Monday Mag or Times Colonist journalists went to the show? Methinks they'll be a wee bit more scathing than you were though ;) - Sun, 25 May 2003 2:23am | ||
| Anonymous | It's really is unbelievable that they went through with it. - Sun, 25 May 2003 4:36am | ||
| ML7Mike | What was the actual musicianship like? - Sun, 25 May 2003 4:57am | ||
| S.V. | Sweetgrass your review brought tears to my eyes. I haven't laughed that much in ages!! :) Thanks! I agree this was a gutsy (albiet insane) move on their part. One wonders why would they risk a small fortune and their reputations on a dumpster dive set and theatrics akin to a pathetic mockery of Rocky Horror meets Monty Python/Spinal Tap. I only wish I could have seen this abomination. Anyone take pics? Advice to The Perish...start humble and the masses will come out of mere curiosity. Display egos larger than GM Place and your misfortunes become the entertainment. Truly a case of karma and humility, you reep what you sow. - Sun, 25 May 2003 10:11am | ||
| der | Perish is the word I use to describe All the feeling that I have hiding here for you inside You don't know how many times I've wished that I had told you You don't know how many times I've wished that I could hold you You don't know how many times I've wished that I could Mold you into someone who could Perish me as much as I Perish you - Sun, 25 May 2003 11:09am | ||
| SweetGrass | Ml7mike... The musicians or should I say musician wasn't terrible. The bass player was tolerable, kept it steady but without creativity. The guitar lead was interesting in an Eddy Van Halen kind of way but he could play well . The music was a kind of wanna be psychedelic rock reminiscent of Led Zep and Yes but not as intricately wound. The recorded sounds of drum lines and other instruments were awful though. Uneven tempos and not well thought out changes. You couldn't understand a word the guy was singing but his voice had a good tone and some potential. It seems to me that the main guy recorded all instruments himself but should stick with the guitar. However I woke up giggling abou the who;e thing this morning. Poor Perish... poor, poor Perish. - Sun, 25 May 2003 1:14pm | ||
| James Kasper | Where were these guys when I needed them last Sunday? - Sun, 25 May 2003 1:30pm | ||
| Wreaker of Havoc User Info... | I think we can all learn a lesson here. Drugs are bad...or bad drugs are bad for you..... - Sun, 25 May 2003 1:49pm | ||
| Shaggy User Info... | heheh Wreaker. Drugs aren't bad, it's the mindset you have when taking them that's bad. Drugs good ;) - Sun, 25 May 2003 1:59pm | ||
| Morgan | Fuck... That sounds like it would have been an awesome documentary...seeing the Perish plan this show, rehearse, deal with press, see them calling the post office regarding stolen mail etc. Oh, and tech rehearsals - "Uhh, yeah, put the xmas trees over there, and you dance here". And then finally the show - ohh man. Would have been fucking rad. - Sun, 25 May 2003 8:44pm | ||
| Anonymous | Careful, don't give the Perish any ideas. - Sun, 25 May 2003 8:58pm | ||
| digger | Let's be very clear. This was one very bad show. There appears to be a lesson here. That lesson is one in which you (musician) never take your eyes off the ball, and you never lose yourself so deep inside a project you get lost. The problem with Jeff, and his co-"artists" is that they have lost complete sense of reality with regards to what they are doing. It's actually a bit sad, they really don't know how bad they are. Perhps the saddest comentary is that they truly thought they were going to "blow away this town" with their show, they truly thought they were going to reach the top after Saturday night. It's a shame that Jeff's energy couldn't be going into a small band, playing out in Sooke while they get their chops happening. The Perish is over, officially now the biggest music joke in town. That's justice served, as there are hundreds of far more talented, and worthy musicians, and bands, in Victoria. I, for one, have taken it as a lesson in keeping a firm grip on reality when writing, recording, and performing music. I feel sad for them, and even sadder as they lash out at the reviews here and elsewhere. It would be wrong to encourage them, either as a joke, or in an effort to see them again for a laugh. This stuff costs money that they probably don't really have, it's not a good vibe. It may be best to let this one go. Digger.... - Sun, 25 May 2003 10:05pm | ||
| Anonymous | Was there ANY sign of the "important industry people" there? Were they the ones heckling? - Sun, 25 May 12:10am No I think most of the industry people were in vancouver for the new music west festival! - Sun, 25 May 2003 10:30pm | ||
| me | That's truly pittiful, I wish I saw it for some reason. It's kinda like the train wreck mentality, you know it's gonna be gruesome and disturbing but you just have to look. see ya Perish. - Mon, 26 May 2003 12:05am | ||
| herman | The show reminded me of my grade 6 Christmas pagent, I think that's the best analogy. All the lights on the stage were the kind you buy at San Francisco for $25; there was so much time wasted with the poorest dance choreography I've ever seen, though most of the time it wasn't even that, they were just walking around waving they're arms all psychedlic-like; the bass tone was the worst grade 8 'I just rented-to-own this piece of crap beginner amp' sound; the sequenced drums sounded just as bad as the bass and were way, way too loud; Jeff Noyes was a very good lead guitarist but always had to watch his left hand when playing rhythm and subsequently did not sing into the mic about half the time, and always pulled away from the mic when singing higher parts as well; the supposed story of the whole show was not just disjointed but totally non-existant, and what acting there was was horrible. In spite of all this, I didn't like the heckling, it always strikes me as a lame attempt to shift audience attention from the performer(s) to the person heckling, and it's made even worse when it's repetitious and followed by fake, over-zealous laughter. I'm glad I was one of the few in attendance last though, boy oh boy. - Mon, 26 May 2003 12:41am | ||
| Anonymous | Herman - Did they make it all the way through the show, or did they close it early? - Mon, 26 May 2003 9:58am | ||
| King Bong User Info... | Ouch....but hey what did you expect...I'm waiting to hear who's fault it was...Canada Post, Monday Boy, some other alien/human conspiricy...the strippers union? Still willing to do a show with you guys if you get a drummer, a set, and significantly smaller expectations...you won't get signed but it will be fun..And at a $5 buck door we will sell the joint out just for the curiosity value... Kola - Mon, 26 May 2003 12:31pm | ||
| Enquiring Minds Want to Know | So what do you think their total financial loss is? Not including any future losses to come from the cancellation of their "100 gig Cross Canada Tour"??? What a terrible way to try to start a career in the music and performing arts industry. Dead in the water on their first attempt... YIKES - Mon, 26 May 2003 1:29pm | ||
| pooetry | i wish i saw this show. i shoulda guessed that they'd be handing tickets out. if i could turn back time, baby, i'd be hanging outside the royal for my freebe. sweetgrass- very good review! - Mon, 26 May 2003 2:46pm | ||
| Phtophile | Pics are now available in "Perish Pics" - General Chit Chat - Mon, 26 May 2003 3:14pm | ||
| SweetGrass | The pics are hillarious but it makes the show look better than it was. - Mon, 26 May 2003 3:28pm | ||
| Anonymous | I agree, the pics do make the show look better. - Mon, 26 May 2003 4:25pm | ||
| Arrrrr Billy | SHOW MORE PICS! - Mon, 26 May 2003 5:38pm | ||
| herman | Yes, they made it through the entire show even though it seemed both hopeless and pointless. And the ending came out of nowhere, it was just another rock song, nothing epic even, and then Jeff Noyes attacked the guy who represented 'radio cheese', the curtain came down, and then he thanked us for coming out. I was sort of relieved, really. - Mon, 26 May 2003 10:02pm | ||
| Anonymous | I know that The Perish came in here and acted all high and mighty, and yes they have a stripper in the band and yes they are from sooke, but I still feel sorry for them. they probably worked very hard to bring you that show. I am glad i am not them. - Mon, 26 May 2003 10:09pm | ||
| Anonymous | It's not the stripper or even that they were from Sooke, it was the attitude. They just got it all wrong right from the start. It's not about showing off it's about entertaining people. Many people have said if they were just a little more humble they would have recieved more support and I think that's fair. - Mon, 26 May 2003 11:37pm | ||
| Joseph Blake | I thought Perish's show was very wise, full of epiphanies.... - Mon, 26 May 2003 11:39pm | ||
| Anonymous | maybe that would explain why you don't write as much for the paper anymore. What show did you see? - Tue, 27 May 2003 9:54am | ||
| http://community.webshots.com/user/1000_words | a few pix of this show... might have been more if they had used some lights. - Tue, 27 May 2003 2:07pm | ||
| Anonymous | I guess $20,000 doesn't go as far as it used to! - Tue, 27 May 2003 5:15pm | ||
| Not Monday Boy | Wait till you see the Monday Mag review!!! - Tue, 27 May 2003 6:09pm | ||
| BigMan | I thought I would do everyone a favour and type out the program that they handed out at the show. All spelling and grammar mistakes are theirs. PERISH PRODUCTIONS Presents (picture of jeff noyes with some lame photoshop effects) The Perish May 24, 2003 ALIEN ROCK IS HERE The Greatest Show On Earth in concert at THE ROYAL THEATRE Victoria, British Columbia May 24th, 2003 ALIEN ROCK INVADES VICTORIA The Perish performs a live stage show about an event to take place in the near future. (Picture of a Mayan calendar) The music you are about to hear is a raw fusion of "Alien" gendre music as there is no category you can describe this band. The Perish takes advatage of the technology available to create a unique sound. Mankind has discovered an ancient alien technology and the creators are about to return. Scene One: They've landed! Scene Two: Area 51 Scene Three: The Cocoon The Perish is proudly supported by: 91.3 The Zone/100.3 FM The Q Monday Magazine Nexus Newspaper Sooke Equipment & Took Rentals Freedom Arts, Sound Sooke Public Fax & Copy center Sooke Home Hardware Only Deals - Sooke Leta's Gifts Sooke Moving 7 Storage LA Limousines We would like to thank our sponsors, and all our friends for their continuous support in the presentation of this concert. Perish Productions is a company dedicated to the advancement of new and weird music. Thank you for coming and enjoy the show !!! CHRISTINE BATTISON Producive, Hardworking and Versatile In 2001, Christine took on the role as The Perish Production manager. She perfroms on bass, guitar and keyboard. Christine was raised in Toronto and now lives in Sooke, Vancouver Island. Christine is influenced by Alice Cooper, Led Zeppelin, Radiohead and Nirvana just to name and has a wide background in jazz and soul music. JEFF NOYES Innovative, Original and Knownledgeable Jeff has been a performing artist his entire life starting at age five. He can perform on any instrument with originality and style. Jeff is responsible for most of the sequencing of the show. Among other tasks, Jeff is always studying the work of other successful musicians such as classic Yes, Led Zeppelin, Guns 'N Roses, Nirvana and the Glen Miller Band to name a few. Jeff's goal for the future is to change the trend of stale music currently played on the airwaves and creating a new category of music. DARREN SKAALRUD Actor, Photographer and Artist Darren plays many roles in the performance, Cheese, Alien daddy, Army Sergeant, implant patient and waiter. He is fascinated by the unexplained in the present as well as our distant past civilizations. Extraterrestrial contact and reoccurring unexplained events in his life has brought Darren, native to Victoria is also an experienced outdoor tour guide through caves and hidden waterfalls. Look for Darrn's photography and funky artwork creations in thirty boutiques on Southern Vancouver Island. SONALI PERERA Dancer, Actress and Choreographer The Perish is pleased to feature the talents of 21 year old Sonali who moved to Victoria from Toronto. Sonali has great interest in dancing and acting and performs tonight as Nure, Cachina, and an Alien experiment. She has been featured in several productions such as Alienated, Lucky Seven, and The Keepers. ALEJANDVO (Alee) GARCIA Mechanical Engineer, Actor and Dancer Alee, from Venezuela came to Canada to improve his English skills. He loves dancing. He says, "The Perish gave me the opportunity to fulfill my dreams. Tonight Alee plays as The Bug, Mad Doctor, Osama bin Laden, Cachina and Pharaoh. - Tue, 27 May 2003 8:02pm | ||
| Anonymous | lolololololololololololololololololololololololololol!!!! - Tue, 27 May 2003 9:16pm | ||
| Photophile | I never knew there was a program! THANK YOU They either didn't proof read or they didn't know any better, as there are lots of errors on their website too. I think the "Sponsors" listed (with the media exceptions)are actually the "Suppliers" where they bought all their production(?) supplies. HUGE DIFFERENCE!!! - Tue, 27 May 2003 9:19pm | ||
| Anonymous | too bad nobody got a picture of the (had to be stolen) shopping cart that was wraped in black plastic garbage bags, and decked out in cardboard that looked like it was painted by a three year old. This was a piece of "alien technology" - Wed, 28 May 2003 9:51am | ||
| brandon User Info... | The shopping cart was "donated" by of one of their sponsors, ya know home hardware - Wed, 28 May 2003 1:16pm | ||
| Anonymous | I wonder who "donated" the commercial crab trap that rounded out this piece of 'Alien Technology'? - Wed, 28 May 2003 2:01pm | ||
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