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CANCER SUCKS continued. . .
| Message Board > General Chitchat > CANCER SUCKS continued. . . |
| moron User Info... | I first met J in Piss Alley when he was still a Rockabilly guy (I so wish I had a picture of him then, you would all laugh which J would I expect want despite it embarrassing the shit out of him). Met him via a mutual female acquaintance basically and ended up seeing him around a lot after that since he was pretty much in the same place as most of us off and on street kid types around then. Shows, squats, assorted delinquency oh boy. I am not sure where it came from but he always hated doctors. I remember riding out to Helmecken hospital with him once because he had the most gnarly in grown toe nail but was afraid to get anything done about it until near the point of gangrene. I hit his foot on the way out there (don't remember if it was intentional or not, probably was) but that was the closest I think I ever came to having J beat the shit out me - his facial expression was worth it though, he he. On the way back to town he bragged about how when the doctor lanced it the pus literally hit the ceiling, vintage J that. I was in a band with J for a while (his first I believe) which was at times frustrating as fuck (for both of us I am sure) but also some of the most fun I had during those times. Probably kept me alive even. J got to take part in some memorable events back then, from the craziness when we headlined at the Sub Upper Lounge (TVs and sledgehammers + a huge crowd = fun) to later on sharing the stage with the likes of The Melvins, Cop Shoot Cop and Jesus Lizard not to mention the cool house shows (Hillside Hellhouse especially). I am not sure why J decided to jam with me but I do remember our first jam at Head Street and how the fact that J was actually into what I was doing gave me an instant boost of confidence which in some ways I still carry. I've never really been a "cool" kid, always was an outsider freak pretty much. Even though J ran with the in crowd, he never once that I can remember tried to exclude me. Social creature he was but zero fucking snob in that man. Saying that Jason Brown thrived on attention is like saying that GG Allin was a little bit rowdy. When I worked with Jay at Rising Star he would often state that "the male ego was a fragile thing and needs constant reinforcement" (in his best shit eating grin of course) and he definitely worked hard on that. The guy was 100% proud peacock but even when that translated into a show being delayed because J needed to go get his fucking hairbrush, you could not stay mad at him for long. When I was still hanging a lot with J he was still in his pre-settle down womanizing period. If you are under the age of say 20 and are from Victoria, your mom has probably slept with him or at the very least has considered it. I literally remember overhearing conversations where otherwise prudish ladies would out one side of their mouth call him "pizza dick" but then follow that up with "I would still do him once", he was just that kind of charmer. At Rising Star (fitting name in this case) I remember multiple times where women would be lining up at the counter up front basically for the chance to go him with him that night. When you see ads for "Axxe" body spray, they are re-enacting scenes from J's life I am sure. Insanity. Yet for all the debauchery and machismo, the guy I knew was actually pretty sensitive, open even. I only ever met his mom once I think ("I'd do her" as J would say) but the impression I got was of a pretty cold family history (at least back when we were kids anyway). I think J's worst fear was of being alone and unloved so he did his best to surround himself with friends. Which wasn't hard since he was fun to be around, knew when to shut up and listen and wasn't afraid to open up himself if the moment called for it. That was probably his biggest gift to folks, he had a knack for making you feel like you and him were the only people in the room and what you were saying to him was the deepest most meaningful shit anyone had ever said (even if it was the drollest whiny crap about whether the girl you had a crush on liked you back). He also truly had a gift for remembering names and faces, and he made sure that everyone got a little piece of him. Guy could have easily been a priest, politician or porn star but his choice was definitely punk rocker and he excelled at it. Once our band broke up I spent less time with J (probably due to the fact I do not have breasts and personally lost interest in punk rock for the most part) but I stayed friendly with him. I remember seeing him perform with Fuck Pig and how he seemed honestly thankful when I congratulated him afterwards, a bit like seeing J clearly through a window (the window being all that other scene and ego bullshit we all carry around). To be honest I was always a little (OK, a lot) jealous of J so the fact that me telling him I thought his band did good actually meant something to him was important to me too. J had no interest really in stuff I was doing later on musically (his love was wholly for that punk rock) but whenever I ran into him he would take time to ask me about what I was up to and specifically ask about my industrial and noise activities. He didn't need to, he could have easily blown me off or gone the "polite nod" route but he didn't. The fact he took the time to talk to me about shit he wasn't really into and yet still be supportive was pretty cool. I think he was pretty much over the attention starved phase by then and he just was happy to know that someone from his old school was still kicking. One of the last times I really talked in depth with him was at a wake for another friend Zack who kicked off a few years back. It was then that he told me he had cancer though he did so with a sly smile. He told me he the doctor gave him six months and that was about 3 years ago. It may seem cold but I have to admit that the last thing I felt right then was remorse, hard to be remorseful for someone who has had such a full life. Sad for sure but Mr. Brown was no wallflower that wasted his time on this earth. I've got no interest in deifying J but that said, the guy had his volume knob at 11 as long as I knew him, shit we are all lucky that there is any life left for the rest of us. You have to work pretty hard to find a picture of J where he ain't wearing a shit eating grin. And that's for one how I will always remember him. Cheers - Wed, 31 Jan 2007 11:29am | ||
| term User Info... | Ron. been a long time, but thanks for pretty much summing up who J was. your last paragraph is the way i remember him too. john b. - Wed, 31 Jan 2007 2:32pm | ||
| _Griphin_ User Info... | I hate to ask, what band were you speaking about? - Wed, 31 Jan 2007 4:31pm | ||
| vulpine User Info... | awwww jay, im gonna miss you! seems like only yesterday we were all bummin around at the alley or john's place ......here's to 27 years of friendship..cheers bro.... ......see ya on the other side! - Wed, 31 Jan 2007 5:46pm | ||
| vulpine User Info... | ..let me amend that cuz my math is terrible even after all these beers...whoops ..i mean years. it was only 22 years. - Wed, 31 Jan 2007 9:12pm | ||
| darryl User Info... | They were in Drone together. The 7" "if you can't eat it or fuck it, kill it" was one of the heaviest local slabs at the time. It saw a tonne of air on my old radio show. - Wed, 31 Jan 2007 9:21pm | ||
| _Griphin_ User Info... |  I just found out Lettuce used to play bass in the band as well (well on one of the 7"'s). Man, I'm too out of touch it seems. - Wed, 31 Jan 2007 10:34pm Edited: Wed, 31 Jan 2007 10:55pm | ||
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| darryl User Info... | Jason and I had exchanged some emails over the last few months and the last one, just over two weeks before his passing was a conversation about our daughters. He told me about some of the things I had to look forward to (his kid, Nadia, is ten, while Emilia is just a month old) and we made plans to hook up for a coffee. I heard last week that he’d slid a bit but I had no idea it was that much. I’ve been scrolling my mind over a few drinks trying to track down all the memories worth sharing but time has really taken its toll on some of those, and really, the joy of those years is hard to effect on paper. I do have some material that I plan to share over a glass with friends. He was there when I showed up downtown. I was around thirteen or fourteen, before the Eaton’s Center, before the new McDonalds, at the corner of Douglas and View where the 50 Goldstream dumped me. The skaters called it “t”, but it was a meeting ground for punks of all stripes. I was more of a rocker at the time but I guess the trench coat and baggy sweater hinted something else. Unlike so many others he wasn’t actually the first one I met. But he ushered me along that night with the rest of the freaks down to St. Ann’s field. We drank wine together, and tequila. I made friends… and got laid. Never once did he blow me off after that night. Looking back I wish I could have lived up to that attitude and done the same for others. I try now though. My fist gig ever was with Soul Charge, opening for Shutdown at Harpo’s, and my parents were there, the only people on the dance floor careening madly while I hid behind my amp. The only other person near the stage was Jason. Front and center in fact full with the knowledge that those old people were my folks. His jibes were totally padded, he could have been meaner, but he continued to prop me up. A week later I was at my second ever show in Vancouver at the Cruel Elephant, and so was Jay. At that gig, we went to the Austin to see some strippers, and he introduced me to the ever illustrious Dayglo Abortions. I was honest to god terrified of those guys but fit in thanks to him. When I went on to bands that fell outside of the realm of the scene he was still really supportive, even giving me a disc last year that he’d scored on tour, a ska-punk band he thought I’d appreciate. The thing I remember most is an afternoon we spent together with a few other people in the summer before Hell House. It’s one of those days like so many others we all had… just hanging out and being free, not really special. It’s that terrible fucking rose tattoo he had. For some reason I remember that more than anything else. We used to compete to not have one of the worst tattoos in town (mine is a bar of Led Zepplin music…uuuugly) and I was always losing. He was proud of the roses and in retrospect they may have been the perfect thing for him. He often came out smelling like one. Not always, but often. There’s a picture of it somewhere on these posts. Check it out. I have this little girl now, and that’s a new beginning to be sure. Jay dying though, is really the end of an era for me, and maybe a few others too. The life that brought me so much, and made me who I am now, is over. Of course I don’t mean I’m giving it all up. We can all still live by that code, and maybe try to live it better. But we can’t get back what we once had. I can never live that life again. Jay, we’ll be mourning you for a long time I think… - Thu, 1 Feb 2007 12:22am | ||
| beazlbub User Info... | i knew jay for prolly 10 years or more we never actually hung out but always talked music when we saw each other at shows ,i knew he was sick a few years ago when he told me about the lump in his arm and that he would soon be getting the lump removed i was amazed at how casual he was about it and it never dawned on me how sick he really was, i saw him a few times when i was workin security at johnson st parkade and when i told him that he didnt have to pay he would just chuckle and pay anyways(unless i caught him before he got to the machine lol) but thats just how he was he never asked for anything and always seemed more concerned about the ppl around him than himself,he always had somethin to say and i will miss talkin to him about music and the scene, you will be missed my friend but you will never be forgotten - Thu, 1 Feb 2007 1:07am | ||
| RSBF User Info... | Hi Darryl - we don't know each other but I just wanted to thank you for that post. Also, congratulations on the birth of your little breath of fresh air, Emilia. My little man will be 20 months old tomorrow. Jay was right, there is so much to look forward to. Your life will never be the same after having a child. Be sure to check out the message board at: http://www.kidsinvictoria.com/forum2/index.php Awesome resource! I had always wondered how old Jay's little one was so thanks for sharing that info. I cannot imagine how hard it must be for her to lose her Daddy at the age of 10. - Thu, 1 Feb 2007 11:13am | ||
| s.v. User Info... | I'm sure I have a picture of him with that rose tattoo somewhere (circa '89?), and I think one with a dragon on his other arm. I have to dig out my old pics and post them. He looks so young and scrawny in them. :) Moron, that was an excellent post! You really captured the spirit of Jay. I will definitely remember his smile the most. He was one of the most charming people I've encountered in this life...a little devil at times, but charming as hell! - Thu, 1 Feb 2007 12:16pm | ||
| RSBF User Info... | I agree - VERY charming ; ) HEY S.V.!!! Been a long time - say hi to Shag for me ; ) - Thu, 1 Feb 2007 1:32pm | ||
| Brittney S User Info... | Jason- You will forever be in our hearts. I will always remember you as the fabulous guy you were over 20 yrs ago. Just want to pass on my condolences to Jay's family. He will be missed by many,Brittney - Thu, 1 Feb 2007 1:54pm Edited: Thu, 1 Feb 2007 1:55pm | ||
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| Ty Stranglehold User Info... | The infamous "rose tattoo" was a casuality of his first cancer surgery. I seem to remember him making a comment about him prefering it as a scar. Hey Brit! - Thu, 1 Feb 2007 9:52pm | ||
| angel of death User Info... | i dont know if anyone else feels it, or has noticed.... but the last few nights everytime i look into the sky the moon has shone so bright and the stars twinkle so much more.... you can just feel jays spirit, his soul shining down upon us.... forever missed and forever cherished a wonderful person and an awesome friend cheers to jay - Fri, 2 Feb 2007 2:37am | ||
| trevor corey User Info... | The moon started getting full on the day. It has had a moon dog every night since. - Fri, 2 Feb 2007 3:05am | ||
| Chris Logan User Info... | (This is a cross-post, but I wanted to make sure the word got out.) I've heard there are plans being made for a show honoring Jay here at Logan's. If anyone has any information about it, could they please get in touch with me? Of course I'll talk to our booker about it as well, but I want to make sure I know everything that's going on so we can make it the best night possible. BTW - I won't be checking the phone number listed here over the weekend, but I will check my email, so that'd be the fastest way to get in touch with me. Or you could just leave a message here on the board. - Fri, 2 Feb 2007 1:03pm Edited: Fri, 2 Feb 2007 1:05pm | ||
| dommieman User Info... | There was a song, way back, about three new stars shining oh so bright after a plane crashed and the music died. Maybe there is another star shining in the north, gee we're gonna miss you evrerybody sends their love. RIP J.B. - Fri, 2 Feb 2007 10:54pm | ||
| beazlbub User Info... | i met jay at some house party when he was in drone he introduced himself to me and pretty much ever since then we would talk music everytime we saw each other at shows ill never forget the time we were standin outside at a show (cryptopsy i think)and he say's "check this out" he takes my hand and puts it on his arm and says" you feel that?"im like "sure man its a lump did ya mess up your muscle or somethin?" jays like "no man its cancer im gonna get it removed soon" i was blown away at how casual he was about it ,we talked a few more mins about his situation and how his family also had been hit with cancer he quickly changed the subject offa him and his troubles and asked me how my life was, thats the way he was he always seemed more concerned about his friends and associates then himself .i saw jay a few times when i was workin as a security guard at johnson st parkade and like always he would ask me how i was doin and if i was gonna be attending upcomming shows around vic im really gonna miss his sence of humor and his abilty to talk tunes he contributed so much to the scene its hard to believe we wont be seein him at shows anymore, you will be missed but never forgotten bro r.i.p - Sat, 3 Feb 2007 1:50am | ||
| Bent Kate User Info... | I just got the news today of Jay's passing. I just wanted to say that I'm floored and reading these threads has been very sad. RIP Jason Brown. I'll play some Fuckpig and think of you. - Mon, 5 Feb 2007 7:11pm | ||
| jackass User Info... | I think that's my first memory of meeting Jay Brown; at Little Fernwood playing a gig with Fuckpig. I just remember lots of fast drumming and the singer screaming "SODOMY" over and over and over and over and over and over and over... - Tue, 6 Feb 2007 7:38am | ||
| Pierce User Info... |  Dimebag Darrell is lookin' for a drummer. R.I.P......Rock in Peace - Tue, 6 Feb 2007 12:57pm | ||
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| unknown smoulder User Info... | I'm thinking that you may want to show Jay and the people close to him (ie his girlfriend of 5 years) some respect and keep your "picking him up" longings to yourself at this point especially. - Wed, 7 Feb 2007 11:42am | ||
| Rawb User Info... | It's amusing that you assume "picking him up" as in the sexual sense. I believe the poster in question if referring to picking Jay up from falling in the pit because he was enthusiastic and engaged in the scene on all levels. The guy was in the pit all the time. And very physical. Now, knowing Jay you are not totally unfounded in your suspicions... - Wed, 7 Feb 2007 1:17pm | ||
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| Robin User Info... | I would never show Jay or his beautiful Angela any disrespect. I've known Jay 17 years!?!! maybe longer. We have no history but friendship. I will miss him in the pit. To Unknown Smoulder, I never ment to hurt you or anyone eles with my heartfelt post. Losing a friend is so hard, and it is easy to see that you have a lost a good friend. - Fri, 9 Feb 2007 12:56pm | ||
| Robin User Info... | P.s. No..........I didnt mean picking him up from the bar. From the Pit. The whole post is about being in the PIT. If I could take the whole post off the site I would. Jay and I are only friends. We have no sexual history. Rawb got it and I hope eveyone eles who reads it will too. - Fri, 9 Feb 2007 2:05pm Edited: Fri, 9 Feb 2007 2:11pm | ||
| trevor corey User Info... | Please dont be upset Robin. I knew what you meant, so did most everybody else. - Fri, 9 Feb 2007 2:07pm | ||
| Robin User Info... | Thank you trevor (and Rawb). When I read the post under mine my heart started to pound, hands started to sweat,and OH MY GOD what did I write?? It's my first post on this site and someone read it as something ugly. Thank you again, That really could have rented space in my mind. - Fri, 9 Feb 2007 3:12pm | ||
| Unknown Smoulder User Info... | See, now when I read the post about "picking him up" MY heart started to pound and my hands started to sweat, but obviously for different reasons! My apologies for the misunderstanding. Appearently everyone's emotions are a little close to the surface... - Fri, 9 Feb 2007 3:17pm | ||
| trevor corey User Info... | Hey Robin. It's Wes here. I never knew your last name, but Sandy pointed it out. Just wanted to say hi. Hope you are well. - Fri, 9 Feb 2007 6:53pm | ||
| Robin User Info... | Hey Wes. Funny, I was just thinking of your shots of joy in trounce alley this past X-mas while shopping. We should catch up sometime. Say Hi to Sandy for me--------X - Sat, 10 Feb 2007 11:20pm | ||
| Goin Postal User Info... | I met Jay way back in '85 when I was a snot nosed little shit.. I took off from home and he was one of the first people I met downtown. I ended up staying in an old abandoned building that night with him and a few of the other local punks. I guess he kinda felt sorry for me and we ended up hanging out a bunch over the next while. He took me under his wing and sculpted me into a punk rocker ...gave me a mohawk,let me be get beat up.. you know.. typical stuff.The one thiong I can say about Jason is that he was one of the most genuine guys you would ever meet. If you were his friend he would go to the end of the earth to protect you if someone was doing you wrong .I remember the day I was sitting in Piss alley when so 'rocker' came up and booted me right in the face and split my lip wide open. Jay's girlfriend at the time ran to Johhny Zee's and grabbed him he left his game in mid game!!! that was unheard of.he came running to the alley to find the guy that did it ... but he was long gone. Jay and I participated in many a fight over the years... but the things that I ll always remember are the fact that he always cared .there were times when Jay was having living arrangement problems so my mom said he could stay a few days at my house.. My mom loved Jason ..no matter how tough he talked and acted downtown he was the complete opposite at my house. I used to bug him and call him Eddie Haskel ..throughout the years I would see Jason on and off and hed always want to sit down talk about old shit . I have a million great memories of Jason ..I will miss him as much as I would miss a brother.I guess I just rambled on a bit there.. I tend to do that but its hard right now . Ill miss you Jay and Ill always love you ! your friend Alasdair Edwards - Mon, 12 Feb 2007 6:52am Edited: Mon, 12 Feb 2007 7:08am | ||
| Ward Ensemble User Info... | Wow, Alasdair, you are the only person i remember from those years other than J. He always seemed like your big brother to me, and I wondered if you had been informed. Be well. - Sat, 17 Feb 2007 1:18am | ||
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