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CAT DIARY/DOG DIARY
| Message Board > Found on the web > CAT DIARY/DOG DIARY |
| trevor corey User Info... | Excerpts from a Dog's Diary 8:00 am- Dog food! My favorite thing! 9:30 am- A car ride! My favorite thing! 9:40 am- A walk in the park! My favorite thing! 10:30 am- Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing! 12:00 pm- Lunch! My favorite thing! 1:00 pm- Played in the yard! My favorite thing! 3:00 pm- Wagged my tail! My favorite thing! 5:00 pm- Milk bones! My favorite thing! 7:00 pm- Got to play ball! My favorite thing! 8:00 pm- Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing! 11:00 pm- Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing! Excerpts from a Cat's Diary Day 983 of my captivity. My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength. The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet. Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am. There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of "allergies." I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage. Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs. I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded. The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicate with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now... - Thu, 15 Mar 2007 5:25pm | ||
| mikey User Info... | HA! sweet, cats are so evil... - Fri, 16 Mar 2007 6:45pm | ||
| Nik Olaz User Info... | Cats forever. - Sat, 17 Mar 2007 1:33pm | ||
| dumpstermesh User Info... | Very true. If Bryn reads this he'll remember the reaction that Emeril had to being neutered. I saw the evil in his eyes that day. - Sun, 18 Mar 2007 12:04am | ||
| Sati User Info... |  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VNvJWVaAOOE - Sun, 18 Mar 2007 1:26pm Edited: Sun, 18 Mar 2007 1:27pm | ||
| trevor corey User Info... |  | ||
| dumpstermesh User Info... | Sati - that video is SOOOOOOOO cute!! Makes me wish I had critters. Besides my newts that is - they're cute in their own way. - Mon, 26 Mar 2007 12:47am Edited: Mon, 26 Mar 2007 12:47am | ||
| Sati User Info... |  | ||
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